Robert Pattinson with his new bike to meet vampires?

It is reported that British actor Robert Pattinson has just bought a bicycle worth 1000 US bucks. It is not reported that he will visit Indonesia, riding offroad onto the hillside of Mt. Merapi to visit the grave of Mbah Marijan, the guardian of the recently-erupted volcano who died in the calamity because he refused to be evacuated.

Pattinson won't think it is funny to give Britney Spears or Justin Bieber a ride and then tries to keep up with the greater Jakarta commuter train on the highway. He never lets his bike be borrowed by George Michael as subtitute of car. We know once Georgle Michael forgot he was on the street.

However, in case Julia Roberts invites him to watch Eat Pray Love together, he might accept the offer. Maybe, he thinks it's okay if Oprah Winfrey borrows his bike for Sesame Street's orangutan. But one thing for sure, England will always welcome him to explore everywhere he likes. He might pass by Salman Rushdie on the way stop by and ask about Rushdie's memoir or may also come across Christopher Hitchens who's surprisingly converted to Islam (a miracle?). Riding bicycle is surely fun and inspiring.

So, when will he meet the vampires? I think a filmmaker knows better than me.

Funny celebrities, funny quotations?

Justin Bieber: What's your name?

Lady Gaga: Where're you from?

Britney Spears: What's your address?

Paris Hilton: Where do you go to school?

Sandra Bullock: Do you speak English?

Vanessa Minnilo: How many brothers and sisters do you have?

Lindsay Lohan: How do you go to school?

Mila Jovovich, Juliette Lewis, Bruno Mars, George Clooney, Clint Eastwood, Nicolas Cage and Oprah Winfrey: You got it?

Funny celebrities? No way! Funny quotations? Which one?

What seem to be funny here?

Don't you think it's funny? These celebrities are teaching a linguist basic English. Before they thought he was a fisherman or a dummy!

James Cameron, Arnorld Schwarzenegger, Avatar 2

Filmmaker James Cameron meets California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to discuss about the sequal of Avatar. Is that true?

No, it's about climate change issue, bailout or something. They don't talk about astrology, either, as both were born under the same zodiac sign, that is Leo.

Cameron is not offering Schwarzenegger a role in Avatar 2, but, perhaps, if Arnold can manage the time, why not? We are not sure about it, are we?

It's like going back to a honeymoon during which they worked together in several movie projects which had made box office.

But the honeymoon won't last for long as suddenly an alient breaks into the door and starts to set a fire at them. However, they only grin on knowing this and so do you. Therefore, I suggest you skip this paragraph and say ...

"GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Milla Jovovich questions the Hollywood Awards Gala?

Dressed in stunning orange long gown, Milla Jovovich looks slim and gorgeous at the 14th annual Hollywood Awards Gala in Detroit.

However, there's something made her wonder that night. When I tried to find out what it was through TV there was no sign of absurdity. Everything seemed to be just perfect.

It looked like she was questioning something with a language which I didn't understand at all. Her eyes blinked and she was nervous.

I asked her, "what's going on dear?"

"How could it be?" she responded.

"What?"

"The people here, they're supposed to be at the train station."

"What are you talking about?"

"They are the train commuters."

I was puzzled but when I started to ask again, I found that, in fact, Milla Jovovich hadn't said anywords at all. How could TV speak with you? Now, those people seemed to question back, "Too much blogging will kill you?"

Michael J. Fox not happy with his past, present?

Michael J. Fox is not happy with his life if it were not just the way it is.

Living nearby a public cemetery together with wife and father in-law was not his goal in life. It never happens.

If only he could turn back the time he would not have taken the commuter train from Bogor to my workplace downtown Jakarta, sitting on the top of it.

And since up to now floodings won't get away from most parts of Jakarta area, he thanks God he was not born in a slum area which was prone to flood.

Ask him about happiness. He won't say, "I'm not an actor, I'm not a star and I don't even have my own car." Whoops, this lyric belongs to Michael learns to rock. I'm not sure if learning to tickle other's fancy is part of happiness, to him. But to me, this will tickle his fancy as to learning how to live in a slum area.

What? No comment?

Alison Sweeney and husband have fun with their kids at the train station?

Alison Sweeney and family have fun at the traiin station? Is it sensational? Surely it is, to tickle your fancy.

To have fun at the train station is surely not good idea. Alicia prefers Camp Ronald McDonald to have fun together with her kids, especially.

And now since she left McDonald, kids still like to climb on top of the train at any train station in greater Jakarta. Of course, the kids are not hers but the fun is perhaps the same.

When you go on a recreation what you're looking for is surely more fresh space out of tied-up routine. The kids and other hundred youth commuters there might find top of the train as a VIP compartment on where they feel free to pee or cry out a kind of frenzy and happiness regardless their own safety.

Alison, ma'am, it is not recommended that you and these kids duck down all the time when the train jolts in case you need to stand for a while. The electricity up there - Wow - horrible! Is it ...

Ma'am?

Whoops! She's already been asleep, leaving me million miles away alone here on the train.

What's transport like in your country? 2014, it is predicted we're going to have gridlock in Jakarta.

Lee DeWyze In New York City To Shake Your Body!

Is it a funny story? American idol star Lee DeWyze to entertain you in New York city. He will shake your body and take you to the sky. However, when you feel like flying at the first beat, remember there's no Superman to find you there and take you home as you get lost in the sky. Silly joke, huh?

When you think it is weird to find the fact that Justin Bieber was ever copied by a middle-aged bald-headed man, Lee DeWyze won't tickle your fancy by letting a sissy imitate him. This is not a funny story everybody wants to hear from a cool American idol star

Surely Lee will make you feel like crawling on the wall in New York city. The rhythm will be so cool and the music will be fantastic. But again, do consider, in case you have reached the top of Empire State building never ever cry for help--there's no Iron Man to tickle your funny bone and narrate a funny story about you wanting to be a star like him! Well there the silly joke goes again!

If you have already watched Eat Pray Love, there Julia Roberts to amaze you with the dazzling scenery of Bali. Lee DeWyze might bring you there with more than the traditional melody. Nothing funny about it. However, when you feel like climbing onto the top of electrical commuter train, surely you have never been to New York. And excuse me, I don't have the ticket with me.

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