3 Robert Pattinson Spoofs To Stop You From Being Bored OnLine

Well, how to prevent yourself from being bored online? These 3 celebrities spoofs written a few years ago are updated to help you "come to your senses."

1. Robert Pattinson and His Bicycle

It is reported that British actor Robert Pattinson has just bought a bicycle worth 1000 US bucks. It is not reported that he will visit Indonesia, riding offroad onto the hillside of Mt. Merapi to visit the grave of Mbah Marijan, the guardian of the recently-erupted volcano who died in the calamity because he refused to be evacuated. No report online that you can find, either that this is the way to stop him from being bored becoming a "dark" actor for many years. Pattinson won't think it is funny to give Britney Spears or Justin Bieber a ride and then tries to keep up with the greater Jakarta commuter train on the highway. He never lets his bike be borrowed by George Michael as subtitute of car. We know once Georgle Michael forgot he was on the street.

However, in case Julia Roberts invites him to watch Eat Pray Love together, he might accept the offer. Maybe, he thinks it's okay if Oprah Winfrey borrows his bike for Sesame Street's orangutan. But one thing for sure, England will always welcome him to explore everywhere he likes. You must not be bored there and you must able to stop your boredom because it's not virtual, it's not online. It's the country where you speak your own language: English.  He might pass by Salman Rushdie on the way stop by and ask about Rushdie's memoir or may also come across the late Christopher Hitchens who's surprisingly converted to Islam (a miracle?). Riding bicycle is surely fun and inspiring.

So, when will he meet the vampires? I think a filmmaker knows better than me.

2. Robert Pattinson and His Bicycle and Kristen Steward

As soon as Robert Pattinson got his new bike Kristen Steward went to wash her hair. Robert didn't know what Kristen was doing and Kristen didn't know what Robert was doing either. After shower Kristen went to the park but Robert didn't know what she was doing there. And Robert, while enjoying riding his bike, never came to Kristen's mind. Both didn't know either what I was doing here. Well please stop being bored when you're stuck online and feel like wanting to throw up. Wow, that's too much? Just read on ..

The couple recently shown public never told me that they used to be together starring a horrow movie. Online? No way? Maybe the title is Twilight or something. Neither did they tell me they were eager to be vampire to amuse me so that I got inspired to write about a tickling vampire. Stop it! When I wish I could get back to the time when bicycle was my means of transport to work, I hope today I can ride along the countryside with it despite my busy days--this is the best way to get rid of boredom, you must stop from being bored, man .... Pattinson and Kristen might want to join, I guess. But the news about Kristen having a ride with Robert Pattison hasn't been confirmed to me.

Twitter, facebook, Digg, Stumbleupon might agree, the possibility is 50:50?  The one to disagree? Ask the vampires.

3. Robert Pattinson Interview, No Bicycle, No Kristen Steward

First we would like to know about your fansite Mr. Pattinson, what's the name? Does this belong to Edward Cullen ...?

Were you on shooting location, Friday night? But what did you do ..., oh wait, I know what you did last summer.

But, please make sure, you have done your homework, so that mommy won't yell at you. I am wondering why you should do your homework? You're a man, you can take care of yourself.

Just speak after mommy, It's too late,Mr. Pattinson, it's the time for you to go to bed but you're still in front of the computer, are you going to post another tickling story?

It is not funny if you say you are Robert Pattinson and ... YOU WHAT?!

I know you're not him. Put off your mask, Mr. so and so, I know what you did last summer.

Blogging! Haha!

Looking For Free Virtual Office?

Hello America, here you are with Live Receptionist Answering Calls, no more cost! What else? Corporate Mailing Address? Company Phone Number? Company Fax Number? You are free to have this virtual office, not something to tickle your fancy, but something to grow up your business and you feel secure about it, no matter where you are, no matter what you do.

You can also have Voice Mail Converted to Email and 2 Voicemail Boxes to help your work fun fast and smooth. Sure, unlimited market out there and it doesn't necessarily take a space to trouble you for work due to a terrible traffic congestion. Remember you are in the USA, you are not in Jakarta to have this virtual office, there you are not free reach your workplace in or on time. Maybe London is less crowded than Jakarta, but here you are now in America to have Faxes Converted to Email, Premium Call Transferring (Call Forwarding) and so on.

Some sites are running special promotion about this. By the way, you live in Kentucky? It's not the time to promote Kentucky fried chicken which now competes with similar products scattered by the street Market of Jakarta; it is free for you to find Your Kentucky Virtual Office nearby. With a recommendation of friends or relatives. Sure, I can do it too if you trust me that I am not only learning to tickle your fancy on this blog. Americans can't cry hard enough for this!

If previously you never expected the speed and efficiency to be so good, now wherever you are all over the USA you can have excellent service having something to free you mind, having your own virtual office without worrying about traffic jams especially and terrible weather. Receiving emails with recorded WAV files and pdf faxes is everything you need for fast and accurate communication, right?

Now you may decide if you there's nothing really free for the best quality, so consider your budget.

• The one somewhere around $99 or close to hundred? It's reasonable for a monthly fee, what do you think? Live Receptionist Answering Calls, Corporate Mailing Address? Company Phone Number? Company Fax Number? All to support your business instantly
• Another one somewhere around $50 per month? Cheaper! I think you still can have Voice Mail Converted to Email Faxes Converted to Email, Premium Call Transferring (Call Forwarding)

So as the one to learn to tickle everyone's fancy, I don't really have to lead you to certain sites available on the Internet. I'll give you a homework. If you can really find a free virtual office there in the USA, not necessarily somewhere around Kentucky, please let me know so that I can fly now to check it out.  Sorry, I cannot do it now. it's not because Jakarta's still hectic and traffic is terrible, I'm broke now.

Good luck.

Travel To India Cheap With Bollywood Celebrities or Guru?

A couple of days ago a friend of mine, an Indian, offered me some tickets to travel all over India with reasonable price. He would give me cheap tickets and promise me to take me to a shooting location somewhere. Wow, imagine those pretty actors?

Flights, hotels, cruise, vacation. Hooray! Finally it's a holiday! But it's all fully booked? Most people believe that last minute travel has to be more expensive. That may be the case with some travel agencies and airlines, but my Indian friend probably works at Travel Agency is dedicated to finding me last minute flight tickets for a reasonable price. Sometimes travel packages are designed specifically for that last minute vacation. It's cheap but without reducing comfort, that's according to him. Well, I don't know whether I believe it or no. But, it's the time for me to have fun, getting out of my routine and explore other country. The celebrities are waiting for me!

Sure, how about these Bollywood celebrities to accompany you anywhere you go there around Taj Mahal? Will these gorgeous, handsome and pretty human beings be singing and dancing around the waterfall with me? You bet, the beauty of panorama will make you feel like in a movie, where anywhere as you can see a flock of background dancers to cheer you up. But, first, think about it is a really cheap travel or no? Or is it a dream. I'd better check it out.

I remember another Indian friend offered me cheap price from this site which is believed to be the best guru of travel and accommodation. At that time I was broke and my niece had already flown to Uga Bay. No fancy, no celebrities there with her. It is one of the finest Sri Lankan vacation options available: an elegant luxury beach resort hotel owned by Uga Escapes with an outstanding reputation for comfort, cuisine, genuine hospitality and tropical-paradise charm. It’s located, moreover, on what is arguably one of the best Sri Lankan beaches, Passekudah. This is one of the best-rated beach resorts in Sri Lanka by guests and industry experts alike and it’s easy to see why.

But Srinlanka is not my main destination. I might trust the guru of accommodation, flight or something, the one which knows much of how to please me. Whether I'll fly to Delhi, Mumbai or Bangalore I'll have the best service. So, what you do you think, do you want to fly to India with Bollywoord celebrities? That's not impossible as along as you have a trustful agent to help you take your fancy and here in this blog, I recommend you to tell me when you'll leave. Please take me there with you, because now I'm broke. Lol.

Why America Is Not The Greatest Country In The World

America leads everything, very dominant and looks powerful, but it is not the greatest country in the world. 

Look at the people, do you think they are the strongest on earth and the most powerful? No way! If you think that the men can work out all the time and add more muscles and make a lot of achievement in life, and the women grab a long life emancipation status, these Americans are not the strongest, not the greatest in the world. What they look like and what they perform on many heroics movies are not what they really are. Now let's see. how many Americans can climb on the wall and crawl like Spider-man and swing from one building to another? How many can transform into such monster as Hulk? Well, that just to tickle your fancy.

The fact is science is progressive here. Freedom is number one. Human rights are well respected. Many people from all over the world come to pursue a study here, but people forget Americans cannot climb the wall and swinging like Spider-man does which is as you know--fictitious. They are not fictitious, they are real, admitting to living in the greatest country and being the best on earth but they are not able to prove it. if you call yourself Uncle Jojo and you deal with this Uncle Sam and you can stay sober getting along with him in a month, you are better than him.

During the 1960s, drugs like marijuana, amphetamines, and psychedelics came on the scene, and a new generation embraced drugs. With the drug culture exploding, American government developed new laws and agencies to address the problem. In 1973, the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration was created to enforce federal drug laws. In the 1970's, cocaine reappeared. Then, a decade later, crack appeared, spreading addiction and violence at epidemic levels. This is not a sign of the greatest country in the world. Why can't you stop drugs? Why do you still respect human rights if such addictive can continuously destroy the nation and laugh at Barbaric bylaw executed by most of Muslim countries?

The mind-blowing facts about porn or free sex in America is another reason that this is a suck nation. When a population can freely lead a life like animal which enables anybody to have sex with anyone anywhere, it is absolutely not the greatest country in the world. What about porn? The average age when a child first sees porn online is 11. 20% of men admit to watching porn online at work. 13% of women do. And more about morally wrong or not wrong this is just to accommodate anything related to human rights?

Well, if this is subjective and doesn't sound humorous then I fail to tickle your fancy. But that's not the point. If it is objective and not for the haters to discredit it, all of us can take a great lesson from here.

Natural Diamond Engagement Ring Recommended For You!

Are you going to get married soon? So a natural diamond engagement ring is highly recommended. But first what do you thing about marriage? Is this sacred, procedural or compulsory? Or you think it's just experiment, trial, or fancy things to do in life?

And about something to please your spouse, is luxury a must? If so, what is your taste of jewelry like? More than marriage itself? Out of sacred, procedural or compulsory? Do you really know the meaning of lavish, by the way? And fancy? if you get bored with usual things then consider natural engagement diamond ring. but if you have any options you can try something unique and lovable. Remember: lovable not laughable. I'm afraid you'll buy stone jewelry instead. the ones that become popular now in Indonesia. It's not funny to see a girl wearing a marble-sized jewelry in her finger. It is for you to know, there are many people selling them by the street market everywhere around Jakarta and in some other towns and cities spreading all over Indonesia. The booming of the stone, the trend which dramatically changes people life, wow! But, as always, once expensive stuff because it's rare and now is getting cheaper as you can find people selling it freely by the street.

Anybody thinking that marriage is only once in a lifetime of course won't let their spouse down. It is reasonable that you spend quite a lot of money to please your partner. Though the future is not for us to see you can get prepared from now on. Consider this before you take action: is she really going to be your wife? Or how about this natural engagement diamond ring presented to her will be hers not yours not both of you and her. Just take it for granted.you deserve happiness and so does she, and the symbol of love you will present, it must be unique mustn't it?

So, congratulation that you'll get the engagement, and first please make sure of yourself that

1. You're really gentleman, never think it's just experiment, trial, or fancy things to do in life. You're really going to get married, make a family and have a happy ending story in life. 
2. You're not a womanizer; just to cheat her and run away soon with more than just a diamond ring that you get from her. That's not a natural thing to do as a gentleman.
3. When you're broke now, never ever try to lend money from a money lender, that's a stupid thing to do. You'll get trapped in big interests the money you cannot afford to pay back. 
4. You're mentally and spiritually health. It is not funny when you are in a sacred ceremony where there are people witnessing the moment you act like Spider-man climbing and crawling on the wall and singing a sad song about love betrayal. 

Well, anyway, the latter just to tickle your fancy. Please stop from being bored thinking about marriage sucks. It is not natural if you instead give this diamond engagement ring to me and recommend me to find another wife. That's not funny at all. 

India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Kenya, Malaysia Investment, How About That?

A friend of mine, an Indian, asks me for a plan of business investment, and I say no. Why? Because I'm broke! I cannot go to Pakistan, Bangladesh, Zimbabwe, Egypt or Korea or Kenya--no body supports Mr. Nurman learns to tickle your fancy to start a business campaign there.

It's just about how to prevent yourself from being bored that I provide this blog that you can feel home sweet home. And you may find what you're looking for to improve your business besides getting entertained as well. You don't have to grumble all the time because your TV befriends you. Here you are save and when it comes to business, I can suggest that you are ready psychically and mentally. If you have a lot of money now and think about expanding, how about India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Kenya, Malaysia Investment? How About That? Or Indonesia with Jokowi as the President, once regarded as a new hope but he seems to go nowhere trapped by the system. Indonesia is a large country and if you like to invest there, it is also recommended. Only the problem is uncertainty law uphold to change investors's mind.

Still you cannot stop from being bored? Nothing so cool here to read after browsing from one blog to another. But you're looking for something to boost your business, aren't you? Already prepared the budget for that? Some parts of the world would be your base camp. Malaysia investment as well as Indonesia offers the same climate, tropical countries located in South East Asia. India, Pakistan perhaps similar to Indonesia-Malaysian context--the people, language of slight different but the same rooth, including Bangladesh and Srilanka, Kenya dan Zimbabwe and some other capitals in Africa continent.

Or other continents? Europe, America and Australia. Unlike India, Pakistan, Bangladesh as developing countries, investors find investment in developed countries gives no much challenge. Some investors don't think about benefit only, they also consider about long-term stability--not sure if you can have it in Indonesia, but Malaysia as its neighboring country, perhaps is saver. Kenya, Zimbabwe and any capitals in Africa, not quite sure of it--nobody ever will support me to get there for a survery! LOL!

For further talk my Indian friend instead asks me about how prevent himself from being bored, because everyday he watches movies; they are all the time-by-time stereotype and boring. He cannot enjoy singing and dancing anymore. He hates seeing actors crying and all those dramatized scenes. He might want to expand his business due to this boredem and investment out of country maybe that's the best option for him to do, and I say no, why? Because not only he is broke as me now, but also he cannot go to other countries, even go to the closer one like Pakistan and Bangladesh. Let alone Zimbabwe, Egypt or Korea or Kenya. You know why? A movie producer contacted him recently and begged him to play a movie without singing, dancing and crying. He is puzzled! Well guys, that's all about a weird business story to tickle your fancy today. 

Quit Smoking Now or I'll Give You More!

If you ask anybody about how to quit smoking now and in your hand there's a bar of cigarette, I think no matter how well a piece of advice is, you will go on.

If you try to do anything to forget all things about this dependency and never ever try to touch a pack cigarette, you just go one step ahead to set yourself free from cigarette bars. How to quit smoking now it's just a joke. A nonsense. We're talking about addiction, something to govern you time by time and glued to you, perhaps till the end of time. Unless you want to fight against it. Not only fighting but you need to be a 'martyr' to save your own life.

It means you need to refrain from a thing that you like very much and it is hard to manage all things just in a short time. It is not about whether you succeed in a first trial, but it's about how to continue quit smoking now or never. A gradual effort, a never give-up hope and a self suggestion that you can really make it. Because you hope that your life should not be governed by the smoke, and on the other hand you are also aware it is not an easy thing to do. Despite there's an option: live longer or shorter? To some this is not frightening.

I personally ever saw an old woman aging 100 or something smoked comfortably. She's my wife's relative and she liked coming over to our our house over and over again asking my wife's name. and there's nothing she worried about. If there's a poster of ad about cigarette product and there's' a hazard warning note on it, not only she doesn't care about it, but also she cannot read it at all without glasses.

How that I successfully quit smoking, you may follow my way if you like, but  afterwards if you would refer back to the first paragraph of this article which is not talking about something to tickle your fancy, then I will give more packs of cigarettes! What?!!!!

My true experience contradicts with this old woman's I told you above who might not be able to sing Britney Spears' song: "I'm not a girl not yet a woman," anymore because she's dead already. I started to smoke when I was 14 and quit 3 years afterwards when I was hospitalized because I suffered a typhoid. Why I gave up? First, I was skinny and had a thin chest, and second, I couldn't focus on my study. I was at boarding school far away from parents and they were separated, so that I wouldn't take an idea of killing me softly.

Up to now, I never even touch one bar of cigarette no matter how much money would I get if someone would like to bet on it. So if you feel like getting "inspired" by this you can decide now or should I give you more packs of cigarettes? Don't worry, there's No Smoking Sign somewhere around this blog. Well, just cannot stop learning to tickle everyone's fancy, anyway!